Through Lime Colored Glasses

By Sharon Proffitt

I just returned from a trip to St. Louis to see my son and daughter in law, on what was perhaps the best visit yet. I can’t say exactly why it was the best visit. Maybe because Justin didn’t have to work the whole time we were there; maybe because we didn’t have to share our time with other parents; maybe just because we knew that it was the last time we would drive to see our kids. They will move to LA in December. On future trips, we'll have to fly.

If you have grown kids you know that a lot of time is spent on the young - teaching, training, and talking them into seeing your point of view. I don’t say this is right, just that it is. I guess we think we can make them like us, if we think that’s a good thing, or make them different from us, if not. We want them to have more than we did, or have better chances than we did….on and on and on. I’m not sure on a scale of 1-10 how successful a parent I was, depends on who you ask, but I’ve realized parenting grown kids requires a change of perspective. I have to put on some new glasses, if you will.

I have four (counting daughters-in-law) great twenty-something kids. I genuinely like them and they seem to enjoy spending time with their dad and me. They have a wealth of knowledge that I don’t have about a lot of things. I see the way they embrace the new world and seem to already master the technology of today. When you’re very computer-challenged you are easily impressed, I know. I learn what I can from them, or just ask them to do some things for me. They give me advice on TVs, computers, cars, and all kinds of services. I rely on them to make good choices. Most of these aren’t major things, but sometimes they can be.

My older son and his wife are parents of the cutest 2 year old in the world. I watch how they parent and nurture and I’m blown away. I see the person that they are molding and she’s amazing to me. Friends say the same things I think. They say how much they appreciate my son, or how insightful he is. These are words that make a parent proud, but the truth is, it’s not about me. He’s just that way. I think he’s someone I can ask for advice on far more than technology. His wife is the most patient teacher I’ve ever had. I’m grateful for all the things that my sons and daughters have to give, and not just to me, but to the world around them.

There are still a lot of things in our kids’ lives that we’d like to see them do differently. They make choices differently than we would. There are so many things we can see that they can’t at this point, but…I have decided to be thankful for the great stuff, enjoying the good times, and learning as much as I can while I have the time with them. I want to speak encouragement and bless them. I want to see them make their difference on this world. I think they are doing a pretty great job!

A change of perspective is good for all of us. Life certainly looks different when I put on my lime colored glasses.